“it was when I stopped searching for home within others
and lifted the foundations of home within myself
I found there were no roots more intimate than those
between a mind and body that have decided to be whole.”
- Rupi Kaur..
|Geplaatst op 22 september, 2016 om 4:45||reacties (1157)|
“Through our eyes, the universe is perceiving itself. Through our ears, the universe is listening to its harmonies.
We are the witnesses through which the universe becomes conscious of its glory, of its magnificence.” Alan W. Watts
Yesterday I found myself suddenly in the middle of a small, personal revolution...
Just like every day, I stood in front of the mirror, to brush my teeth and hair and put in my contact-lenses and…
Normally, after these basic actions, I put on mascara on both my upper and lower eyelashes.
Yesterday, without any psychological exercise beforehand, for the first time in say 15 years, I suddenly thought
‘No, I don’t need it. I look just fine.’
As the day went on I just kept feeling fine, even the moments where I felt a bit tired and looked in the mirror
I did not come back to my decision to go through my day with my eyes, just the way they are.
I became aware of the thoughts I had for years and years that were simply not true!
I thought that, without this extra bit of darkness on my eyelashes, I look tired, like I had just woken up or cried
and my eyes look smaller. Like I somehow needed to confirm the existence of my eyes, by painting a dark line around them.
Today I keep on thinking about this little miracle of contentment with my own nature.
Is this the free advantage of being in my thirties?
The difference mascara/no mascara might look just a trifle, but what does it actually mean when I look at it on a deeper level?
I guess I start to feel free. I am doing things again I thought I couldn’t do. I have two instruments at home that I deeply love,
a little celtic harp and an electronic piano. I did not touch them for months. Why? For sure not because I do not love to spend
my time with them. I did not play because I thought I was not worthy of playing hem. Because I thought I couldn’t.
The black beast of insecurity got me in its claws and I was not even aware of it.
Now I released the child that just loves to play. She gets into a trance on the repetition of a few simple chords.
She sings her own songs to it. She knows, without knowing.
Thoughts can be like dirty fingers, keeping the flower of creativity away from blossoming.
No need to confirm the flower with lines, words or sounds. If she does, it is for nothing but play.
Just blossoming this words out here on the blog, to release the natural beauty to possibly cause more little revolutions
of freedom through contentment..
|Geplaatst op 16 september, 2016 om 15:50||reacties (487)|
|Geplaatst op 11 september, 2016 om 3:55||reacties (460)|
The above picture was the inspiration for the actual cover (see 'home'). 'The peacock's hunger' - LDB
I want to tell you the whole story about the final cover picture here...
As a baby, toddler and small child my parents often took me for a walk to the park. In the park there was what seemed a special little palace for the peacock. I thought of him as magic.
In my twenties I had a spiritual dream about what I called ‘the Lord of the peacock’. There was a loving man in the peacock’s palace of my youth and there were other spirit’s celebrating with him. I was a girl, going into the park, walking to a little stream where I sang my song. The song combined with the water of the stream turned into a flower, like some secret alchemistic brew. I took the flower back to the Lord and felt intense happiness when he received my flower with a loving smile and I woke up.
Later, through the practice of Hatha Yoga I felt attracted to mantra-singing which caused me to visit the ashram Sadha Shiva Dham in Loenen, The Netherlands. The Guru I loved and admired was Shiva, the Lord of destruction and new beginning, often visualized besides a peacock. I saw the bright pictures of Shiva and the peacock and was reminded of my memories. Somehow the call of the peacock brought me in touch with the sparkle of my creativity, as did the mantras. Funny enough, the press this little book will be printed by is called Tandava Press, revering to the dancing Shiva! Even though at the moment my interest doesn't lie with the Hinduistic religion in particular, I love to see what I took as spiritual signs in my past, coming back to me in the present.
I did the four other illustrations before considering the theme of the cover. Because of moving place I was sorting our my box with drawings and my lover’s eye fell upon a colourful one of a fantasy-peacock, the only one I ever drew. He absolutely loved him and because of his enthusiasm I got to the idea to use the peacock for the cover. I’ve been mentioning Ink-birds here at home and here my love recognized one, it’s the ink-bird, the call of the ink bird! Because the style of the drawing did not fully fit the other ones I made a new one.
In the title ‘The Call Of The Ink Bird’, ink is used as a symbol of nature’s providing everything we need to fulfill our missions. The call of the bird, a metaphor for our inner hunger to create. Can you hear your ink-bird calling?
|Geplaatst op 10 september, 2016 om 3:00||reacties (648)|
In the silence of no-thought - The sound of the sea
I live in a closet, just because I like the smell of the wood. Closets always remind me of the ocean.
I don´t know why, but somehow a human body in a closet drifting somewhere on the ocean is familiar to me.
To my humble opinion a human being in a closet is just as natural as an oyster in a shell.
It may sound a little bit more edgy, a little less organic but don´t forget that wood is something alive.
It´s like being inside of a tree in the water and guess what´s beneath the water?
It´s earth, of the same kind where we walk on. And what´s under this earth?
Maybe it´s not yet fire but somewhere it must get bloody hot in there, like in a club
where the hottest materials go naked and dance ecstatic.
In a closet in the ocean you are pretty close to it all. And above, there are the little sparkles
of non-existing stars.
Think about it, everything that is giving light comes out of something dark.
So when I come out of the closet on the dark ocean in the black night and lay myself on it I´m giving light.
Something will find its way to me, that´s for sure. I feel so much love over there, thinking about the word ´resonation´.
Maybe a dolphin will lay itself on my body, blessing me with inspiration for a lifetime, and then think again:
what could be resonating more with this than happiness. The creature finding you in a closet in the ocean
is your true soulmate that you've missed for ages.
Besides you don´t have to do any meditation courses anymore. Just lock yourself up and feel free in the smell of the wood.
It can even talk! Hello, it says, I congratulate you, every day is your birthday.